Do you recognize yourself in one of these statements: “I tend to want to find solutions to everything.” “I worry too much about things beyond my control.” ” I try to carry people’s burdens like… More
I never really thought about my convictions even though I knew what my religious convictions are; I always thought every other thing would stem from there. But as the values of the world are evolving, and we are faced everyday with new social challenges, I ask myself: what are my true convictions, what would I fight against, what does truly matters for me and what don’t, if was facing a dilemma, what option would I choose and why?
I realized that it is important to know now than facing a situation where you are totally confused. The danger in not knowing is that you start to embrace the convictions of others which are not necessarily yours, maybe it’s your parents, your friends or colleagues’ but it’s not yours. Having your own convictions began by challenging what you already know and see if fits with you current values. I say current because this might change over time, as you grow older or getting more maturity.
So, my goal now is know what my true convictions are. This is going to be interesting because, I love to have my own opinions about things, I want to know myself better and learn how to fight for what I believe in. That doesn’t mean that I am not open to others opinions, I am, because I love to learn from others.
What are your convictions? What do you think it’s worth fighting for?
As I was preparing for a wedding, I noticed I didn’t mind leaving my camera at home. A year ago, I wouldn’t have left home without it, feeling that I had to capture every moment. The pictures I took during social events are located somewhere on my laptop and most of them I don’t need. So, why did I take them in the first place?
Well, to be honest I’d say it was to do as everyone else. To show others there were things going on in my live. But as some point, I felt overwhelmed.
Because if I didn’t bring my camera, it was like I was not part of the event and this prevented me to “be there” each time. I was too busy taking pictures rather than living and enjoying the moment.
And secondly, I had to always make sure that I looked flawless in those pictures because, of course, I’d be posting them on those famous social networks. And I hated that because it made me feel self-conscious.
Ever since I’m not following this trend, I’m able to enjoy each moment and I don’t feel like I need the world to know about it.
I do take a few pictures that are really meaningful to me and which do not have the sole purpose of showing my new dress or that I have been to Mrs. or Mr. X party.
Have you ever felt pressured to follow social trends?
“And become nothing to you? Am I a machine without feelings? Do you think that because I am poor, obscure, plain and little that I am soulless and heartless? I have as much soul as you and full as much heart! And if God had blessed me with beauty and wealth, I could make it as hard for your to leave me as it is for I to leave you. I’m not speaking to you through mortal flesh. It is my spirit that addresses your spirit. As if we’d passed through the grave and stood at God’s feet equal. As we are!”
Is it only me who believes that this is the best quote in a romantic movie? I’ve been watching “Jane Eyre (2011)” and I love it!
I’ve never read the book (shame on me!) but I think that the movie is quite good.
Have you watch the movie? What do you think of it?
I have watched recently the documentary: Deborah 13: Servant of God and it raised a few questions and thoughts in me. I’d like to share them with you:
1- First of all, in the documentary, when the reporter ask the girl if she doesn’t know Victoria Beckham and Britney Spears, I asked myself why are we so obsessed with other people’s life, why some people wants to know the last dress Victoria Beckham bought, Britney Spears new boyfriend, which “star” was arrested for drug possession or speed-driving, which one went to rehab, or which one got divorced? It goes as far as stalking and harassment. I rembember a youtube video where a young woman spend all time fantasizing about Robert Pattinson and cried hysterically when he broke up with Kristen Stewart. Again, why are we so obsessed with other people’s life? Does it means that our life are not meaningful enough? Don’t get me wrong, it is ok to be interested to other people, this is why we read biographies, watch movies, etc, but we why aren’t we curious about Aung San Suu Kyi first boyfriend or what brand her clothes is or where does she buy fruits, but are dying to know where Beyoncé shops her lingerie or who is Chris Brown new girlfriend?
2- I have read the comments below the documentary, there are plenty of positive comment but some commenters blame her father for raising her like that saying: “their ignorance pervades everything”, “it is all grounded on fear. Fear of God. Fear of the outside world. Fear of people. Fear of being hurt or offended or seduced (by watching some inappropriate media). Fear of life itself”, “she is indoctrinated”. So, those people think that because she has been raised in “strict Evangelical Christian” home, that she is missing out on what the world has to offer, she is being indoctrinated. What should be normal then? That she had smoked her first cigarette, had sex, went clubbing every night, went to parties, knew the celebrities name by heart, watched soap operas, had earphones stuck on her ears, spent her days gossiping on facebook, twitter and the like? Is that the world definition of an average teenager?
What does the Bible says about raising children:
– “Train up a child in the way he should go; even when he is old he will not depart from it.” Proverbs 22: 6
– But as for you, continue in what you have learned and have firmly believed, knowing from whom you learned it and how from childhood you have been acquainted with the sacred writings, which are able to make you wise for salvation through faith in Christ Jesus. All Scripture is breathed out by God and profitable for teaching, for reproof, for correction, and for training in righteousness, that the man of God may be competent, equipped for every good work. 2 Timothy 3:14-17
– “Fathers, do not provoke your children to anger, but bring them up in the discipline and instruction of the Lord.” Ephesians 6:4
3- The documentary make it seems like Deborah’s family is an exception among the world’s other families, at least from my view. It’s like they are a bunch of aliens living on the fringes of society. It seems that Christianity, (or should I say belief in the Most High God) is becoming something that once was but no longer is the norm, it is fading to leave place to new beliefs, new ways of living, humanity have shifted its beliefs. The Bible said : “But mark this: There will be terrible times in the last days. People will be lovers of themselves, lovers of money, boastful, proud, abusive, disobedient to their parents, ungrateful, unholy, without love, unforgiving, slanderous, without self-control, brutal, not lovers of the good, treacherous, rash, conceited, lovers of pleasure rather than lovers of God— having a form of godliness but denying its power. Have nothing to do with such people.”
If you’ve watched this documentary, what are your thoughts about it?
Oh, baby with your pretty face
Drop a tear in my wineglass
Look at those big eyes
See what you mean to me
Sweet cakes and milkshakes
I am a delusion angel
I am a fantasy parade
I want you to know what I think
Don’t want you to guess anymore
You have no idea where I came from
We have no idea where we’re going
Lodged in life
Like two branches in a river
Caught in the current
I’ll carry you. You’ll carry me
That’s how it could be
Don’t you know me?
Don’t you know me by now?
Poem from the movie “Before Sunrise” by David Jewell
Recently, I overheard a conversation where a man told a girl that one of his friend was “dreaming about her”, the girl seemed pleasantly surprised but said “that is not appropriate”. Another man who was present said: “On the contrary, that is a good thing. you are his fantasy. You should be proud about it because you are saving this guy marriage. If he cannot go through with his wife, he’ll think about you.” It seemed something very funny because everyone laughed.
I did give it some thought and said to myself, this is not normal. But who am I to define normal? With all sexual tendencies in the world, all kinds of depravity, what is normal? Well let’s just imagine we are in a “normal” world.
So, here we have a girl who has sensual power over a man, a man who is fantasizing about another woman and…the poor wife. Yes, the poor wife, the third wheel of the carriage. Poor wife, because while her man may not be adulterous, he is dreaming about another woman, which is practically…the same thing.
So at this point, people will start telling me that it’s ok for men to fantasize about other woman, that women does it too, for example when they see Ryan Gosling’ sexy abs.
Why it is so difficult for men (especially) to stay attracted to their wife? Marriage should not be based on physical attraction SOLELY but I believe it’s a MUST to be aroused by your husband or wife. Because if each time you are making love, he or she has to think about someone else to heat things up, we have a problem here.
Men fails to see their wife as their mistress, because a mistress is like the forbidden fruit, it’s tempting, delicious and exciting. So Wife, why not try to be your husband mistress?
Your husband should be impatient to return home to literally crawl in your arms, not thinking about this hot girl in the office he would like to….
Why be ashamed of going wild with him because last time we checked, you are married meaning you have the legal right to do whatever you feel like doing. If a mistress is willing to make him feel good in-any-possible-ways she can think of, why not you?
Why not surprise him with that sexy negligee so his jaw will drop? Why not take this warm bubble bath with him after a hectic day of work? Why not share your fantasies with each other? Men should encourage their wife to be intimate with them, to share their true feeling. Why your wife should be the boring daily meal and your mistress the exotic cocktail or delicious dessert?
Women, claim your right to be your husband mistress. Show that man you can surprise him beyond his expectations. Be your husband fantasy!
Have you ever experienced this embarrassing moment where something fun is going to happen and they ask you whether you want to participate and someone says: Nah, she is a “church girl”. It might not be the exact term but something like: she is not that kind of person; she is not interested (i.e. interesting) and so on. Well, I had my share of “church girl” moments.
And one of them happened recently where gathered with a small group of people, someone mention the term “church girl” popped up ( referring to me), saying that there are certain things that I wouldn’t do and certain places I wouldn’t go.
You might honestly think: what’s wrong with that?! So let me tell you the real characteristics of the church girl:
– You never dress sexy ( i.e. You are not interesting because you never show some more skin)
– I know you are not interested to go to that party ( i.e. you are boring, you don’t know how to have fun)
– Don’t talk that kind of stuff in front of her (i.e. you’ve been so sheltered that our conversations will shock you and therefore you will make us feel uncomfortable)
– You are too prude ( i.e. you should get your freak on sometimes)
– You don’t drink beer?! (i.e. you’re antisocial)
So now that I’ve told you the characteristics of the church girl, so according to this here is a definition: she is a Christian, a very spiritual person and she avoids the world’s pleasures (and that includes having fun with friends, going to a good concert, to the beach, talk about sex (Oh My! That’s a sin!))
I have also realized that most church girls are like me: introverts. To illustrate this, I remember during a class, there was this girl that was making her friends laugh so much and one of her friend said: And you’re supposed to be a church girl? (meaning: you’re too funny to be a church girl)
People assimilate someone who is spiritual with someone who is introvert, which is not true because the church is comprised of every type of people: introverts, extroverts and ambiverts.
I usually smile when people call me a church girl, sometimes, I’m tempted to tell them that they are completely missing the point but I always give up. Other times, I think they are being rude, because it’s like you’re being banned from a conversation because your “ears are too prude”.
Some might think that is ok because everyone knows you are different and as a Christian you SHOULD be different, you should stand above the crowd, and I agree with this. But this label has negative connotations because people consider you as antisocial, of course we do not belong to this world but we’re living in it, and most of the time , people don’t take the time to know the real you because you have been labeled already, so what’s left to know?
One thing I know is that I’m proud of being a Christian, I’m proud to be called daughter of the Most High God, and this has nothing to see with my social ability to interact with people. This makes me think that people usually don’t see further than the tip of their nose, unfortunately.
People need to understand that spirituality doesn’t mean confinement, boredom or seclusion; on the contrary, worshipers of God should be most of times joyful. Of course, Christianity always aspire to simplicity in life but that doesn’t exclude joy, happiness, fun, and interesting interactions.
People should not stereotype others because they are different, or because they don’t share the same point of view or they don’t have the same beliefs and values or because they do not fit in your circle.
Have you ever in been in such situation where you have been called a “church girl” or the like? How did you feel about it? How did you respond?
Hahaha, I’ve just realized it’s been one year since I have this blog. I started Chrysalide in March 2012, upon my sister’s encouragement (Thank you R.M.) and blogging have been a real delight, allowing me to express and share my personal thoughts and peak inside other people’s world through their blogs.
Even though I have not been very active lately, it’s something to celebrate. I will keep blogging, and I hope to share more in the future.
But in the meantime, “Cheers!”
Lately, I’ve been very discontent with my life. The thoughts that were crossing my mind were: “I hate this life”, “I’m tired of this”, “I wish I could be elsewhere” and so on… Why was I so bitter?
And it came clear to me. I failed to rest my soul on God. I failed to come to Him in prayer, to worship Him, so I ended up complaining about anything that wasn’t going well.
I feel like I’m dwelling in the same spot, and everytime this happen, it’s like God is telling me: My dear child, you are not moving at all, I want to help you not being stuck where you are but you just won’t let me. And the biggest mistake you could make is believing you can do everything without relying on My Strength.
There are countless self-help books out there showing you how to be the best you but I’m telling you, you are your best you only through Christ. Only Him can make the necessary changes in your life.
Nowadays, everyone is its own god. Everyone is creating their own beliefs, moving away than ever from God’s authority. Do not make this mistake. The world wisdom is not God’s wisdom. The world wisdom is fleeting but God’s wisdom is eternal.