When enjoying the moment is more important

As I was preparing for a wedding, I noticed I didn’t mind leaving my camera at home. A year ago, I wouldn’t have left home without it, feeling that I had to capture every moment. The pictures I took during social events are located somewhere on my laptop and most of them I don’t need. So, why did I take them in the first place?

Well, to be honest I’d say it was to do as everyone else. To show others there were things going on in my live. But as some point, I felt overwhelmed.

Because if I didn’t bring my camera, it was like I was not part of the event and this prevented me to “be there” each time. I was too busy taking pictures rather than living and enjoying the moment.

And secondly, I had to always make sure that I looked flawless in those pictures because, of course, I’d be posting them on those famous social networks. And I hated that because it made me feel self-conscious.

Ever since I’m not following this trend, I’m able to enjoy each moment and I don’t feel like I need the world to know about it.

I do take a few pictures that are really meaningful to me and which do not have the sole purpose of showing my new dress or that I have been to Mrs. or Mr. X party.

 

Have you ever felt pressured to follow social trends?

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The Church Girl Demystified

Have you ever experienced this embarrassing moment where something fun is going to happen and they ask you whether you want to participate and someone says: Nah, she is a “church girl”. It might not be the exact term but something like: she is not that kind of person; she is not interested (i.e. interesting) and so on. Well, I had my share of “church girl” moments.

And one of them happened recently where gathered with a small group of people, someone mention the term “church girl” popped up ( referring to me), saying that there are certain things that I wouldn’t do and certain places I wouldn’t go.

You might honestly think: what’s wrong with that?! So let me tell you the real characteristics of the church girl:

–          You never dress sexy ( i.e. You are not interesting because you never show some more skin)

–          I know you are not interested to go to that party ( i.e. you are boring, you don’t know how to have fun)

–          Don’t talk that kind of stuff in front of her (i.e. you’ve been so sheltered that our conversations will shock you and therefore you will make us feel uncomfortable)

–          You are too prude ( i.e. you should get your freak on sometimes)

–          You don’t drink beer?! (i.e. you’re antisocial)

So now that I’ve told you the characteristics of the church girl, so according to this here is a definition: she is a Christian, a very spiritual person and she avoids the world’s pleasures (and that includes having fun with friends, going to a good concert, to the beach, talk about sex (Oh My! That’s a sin!))

I have also realized that most church girls are like me: introverts. To illustrate this, I remember during a class, there was this girl that was making her friends laugh so much and one of her friend said: And you’re supposed to be a church girl? (meaning: you’re too funny to be a church girl)

People assimilate someone who is spiritual with someone who is introvert, which is not true because the church is comprised of every type of people: introverts, extroverts and ambiverts.

I usually smile when people call me a church girl, sometimes, I’m tempted to tell them that they are completely missing the point but I always give up. Other times, I think they are being rude, because it’s like you’re being banned from a conversation because your “ears are too prude”.

Some might think that is ok because everyone knows you are different and as a Christian you SHOULD be different, you should stand above the crowd, and I agree with this. But this label has negative connotations because people consider you as antisocial, of course we do not belong to this world but we’re living in it, and most of the time , people  don’t take the time to know the real you because you have been labeled already, so what’s left to know?

One thing I know is that I’m proud of being a Christian, I’m proud to be called daughter of the Most High God, and this has nothing to see with my social ability to interact with people.  This makes me think that people usually don’t see further than the tip of their nose, unfortunately.

People need to understand that spirituality doesn’t mean confinement, boredom or seclusion; on the contrary, worshipers of God should be most of times joyful. Of course, Christianity always aspire to simplicity in life but that doesn’t exclude joy, happiness, fun, and interesting interactions.

People should not stereotype others because they are different, or because they don’t share the same point of view or they don’t have the same beliefs and values or because they do not fit in your circle.

Have you ever in been in such situation where you have been called a “church girl” or the like? How did you feel about it? How did you respond?

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Random thoughts

A purpose

I cannot understand how something can spend his life or even a huge part of his life without doing nothing. I mean, wake up everyday, eat, watch tv or any unuseful activity, then eat again and go to bed. What’s the purpose of that kind of life?

Each day I go to work, then after I go to college but sometimes, I feel like slowed down as if the things that I am doing are not meaningful enough. Is it because that I am not doing what I should be doing, that I have not found my mission or purpose in life yet? I don’t know but something I want to do more, explore more, read more, love more, travel more, do a little EXTRA.

So, on the other side, we have people who are not doing anything. Don’t get me wrong, I know that are people who would love to do something with their lives but life conditions are so mean to them that they cannot find a job, afford college or pay for travels, etc.

But there are people who have the means to do something, even small, but they just don’t. How can you survive the same routine every day without any meaninful activities?

 

Routine  is a slow-killer

Talking about doing the same thing everyday, let’s talk about something that kills us slowly: routine. When I say kills us, I mean that it kills our creativity, it kills our spontaneity, it kills our sense of wonder, even our joy.

Take action against it!

@Google Images

 

 

Another perspective

When you are dealing with a problem, try to view it from another perspective. Try to understand it from various points of view. Maybe it’s not that complicated that you thought or maybe it’s not that simple than you thought it is.

 

10 lessons life has taught me this year…

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This post might be premature as the year has not ended yet but no need to wait the end of the year to make review of what life has teached us.  As a matter of fact, first thing I learned is don’t always do things as they planned to be done. Sometimes, you have to break the patterns and do things differently.

2- God is Good All The Times. Never doubt this, whatever your circumstances may be, God is always good.

3-Be content with what you have now, dont wait for the future to enjoy life and what it has to offer.

4- Bless others. Don’t wait only on God’s blessings, you can also be a blessing for someone else. By being compassionate, helpful, encouraging, by speaking words of kindness, by praying for others.

5- “Never take someone for granted. Hold every person close to your heart because you might wake up one day and realize that you’ve lost a diamond while you were too busy collecting stones.”  This one is a good lesson that I will make sure to live by.

6- Through your walk with God, your faith might be tested. You have to be willing to make a giant leap of faith. God wants to help you but you might have to do something unusual or something that requires that you step out from your comfort zone. It might be a little hard, but the reward will be far greather than anything you’ve ever imagined.

7- Don’t take people’s point of view for granted, try to figure out things by yourself before making an opinion.

8- It is always good to review your priorities, renew your old thinking because as you grow up, you realize that things are not always as they seems to be or as they taught us it is. Don’t be afraid to step out of the crowd and fight for your beliefs because “Those who mind don’t matter, and those who matter don’t mind.”

9- Nobody’s perfect. Don’t expect perfection from people, only God is perfect.

10- Life is not a road with one direction. This is one of the most important lessons I have learned this year.  As a child, our parents have paved the way for us, and as we grow up, society wants us to enter in the mold specially prepared for us. Well, let me tell you that you do not need to follow the world’s standards. Dont stress yourself with what your parents or society think you should do but rather what God has planned for you.  Because at the end, the achieved result is what matters.

UnikCat ©

 

Singleness

When are you going to get married?

Where is the man?

What are you waiting for?

Don’t wait too long.

You need a boyfriend.

Is anyone courting you?

Those are the questions and remarks I received nowadays . People wants to know when I am taking the big step. And some of them find it awkward that I am still single.

Yes, I am single  and no, I am not going to get married next month.

I’m wondering why people think that the clock is ticking for me while I think I still have the time?

You can NEVER please society. It’s utopia. Forget about it. You’ll go crazy.

It’s that kind of social pressure that cause marital disaster. Everyone is rushing when they should take time to prepare themselves for such venture.

It’s marriage people! I know that marriage is becoming less and less valued in today’s society but for some people, it’s a SACRED INSTITUTION.

God created marriage for a sacred purpose and with its many implication, we cannot rush into it however we want.

Maybe I have an idealistic view of marriage, I admit it, maybe because I am a romantic person, but none the less, as you are learning, studying and preparing to start a business venture you should also prepare for marriage the same way.

Yayy! She finally got one!

Of course, I want someone by my side (who doesn’t?) but I’m saying to myself: Take Your Time and no,  I am not going to lower my standards in order to find someone to get married.

Because of the huge respect I have for marriage, I am willing to take the necessary time to build a strong foundation for my future home.

If they could grant me one wish for my sentimental life, it would be to have a strong and lasting relationship with my partner.

And I believe that singleness is a period where one should reflect about what they really want, about their expectations and also the time where you achieve some of your goals because when you end up with a family, it’s sometimes difficult to cope with everything.

So, as I patiently (not all the times!) wait for the “One” ( according to God’s will),  I am working on myself to be that wonderful woman that a man would want in his life.

“If you want to attract a king, you must first learn how to be a queen.”

UnikCat

The joy of decluttering

I was thinking about the progress I have made in self development and I am quite happy how it is going along well.  I have learned that I do not have to tolerate things that are bothering me and the best thing to do is to get rid of them and this applies to all aspects of life.

For instance, my wardrobe was full of clothes, hanging in a disorderly fashion and each time I got out from work and saw it , I knew I had to do something about it but I did not. Then, last weekend I finally decided to end its suffering, so I took all the clothes, and sort them, what I intend to keep and what I should get rid of or give away. After that, all the clothes that I kept I hung them in the wardrobe and I would swear I heard it say: Oh, My God, thank you, I am finally breathing! loool.

I also did some decluttering at work also, get rid of papers, stuff I did not need anymore, and I am more enthusiast to work now.

This is also apply in your social life, you do not have to be friends with everyone, specially the people that are always trying to bring you down, the hypocrits, the free riders and even some  family members, yes, if you see that they are having a bad influence, stay away from them.  Life is much better without them, trust me, the only person that is essential is JESUS.

The idea is to keep it simple in every aspect of your life, you do not need the whole wide world to be happy.

UnikCat

My two biggest mistakes

I have always lived and planned for the future, what I mean is all my objectives, all that I want to do are to be done in the future.  I want to have a car (in the future), I want to travel ( in the future) I want to write a book ( in the future) so what I failed to understand is that the future was in fact…yesterday.

Yes, by always projecting myself in the future, I have lost sight of what is important: live in the present.  The present moment is exactly where things are happening, where dreams come true, where objectives are accomplished.  I had that wrong idea that everything would be perfect in the future, everything would be settled, I would have the perfect job, the car, the house, etc etc…. but the fact is while I am dreaming of those things, I have failed to do what was important: work toward those goals in the present.  I didn’t thought that the future that I am talking about will slip away if I am not taking time to live in the present. I have forgotten that the NOW is all we’ve got. Who knows what will happen tomorrow (we ain’t psychics), only God knows.  We do not hold tomorrow, we only hold the present moment.

As I’ll be celebrating a new year soon, I come to rethink the way I live and my point of view about life. I want to enjoy every single moment, seize the opportunity when it comes and not wait for things to get perfect. I want to get rid of the old thinking and enjoy the life God has given me, not scarcely but plentifully (lovely word, isn’t it? 😉  )

Ok, the second mistake is that  I have that difficulty to finish what I start and it’s a burden in my personal life. I was in Spanish class, I quit for false reasons. I was learning how to drive, I quit for false reasons.  I am a fanatic of the saying: Never give up, but I seem to have a hard time practicing it.  I have thought about it and what I need is self-discipline. I know what I want, and where I want to go but I just need to follow the road and not skip to the next U-turn.

 I wrote up earlier that I was going to celebrate a new year, I’m turning 24 in a few days and I really want to take some time for me, rethink my priorities, a bit like a reset time. So do you have some suggestions about how I could celebrate? Your comments are welcome. 

UnikCat